Buying marijuana for my aunt

Kroger clerk: Can I help you sir? You look lost.

Me: Good morning. Yes, my aunt has terminal cancer and would like some marijuana. I was wondering where you keep it?

Clerk: Um ...

Me: I thought the raw product might be in Produce, but I didn’t see it there. I’d prefer organic if you have it.

Clerk: Um ...

Me: Then I didn’t know if the edibles would be in the Candy aisle, or maybe by the ibuprofen.

Clerk: Um, sir, we don’t sell marijuana here.

Me: OMG, why not? You could put it on the same aisle as the munchies, and revenue would go up immediately! Do you have a suggestion box? Or maybe I should talk to the store manager ...

(Note: The Kroger stores in Colorado are called King Soopers, but I figure that most people know the Kroger franchise, so I used that name here.)