Clerk at Whole Foods bakery: Good afternoon.
Me: Hi. I was wondering, has all this bread been out here all day?
Clerk: Why yes sir, we baked it fresh this morning.
Me: But since then it’s been sitting out here in the open?
Clerk: Yes sir.
Me: Does the manager know about this?
Clerk: Huh?
Me: Well, that woman over there, she just sneezed. And that guy over there has been coughing, and that’s just in the last two minutes. Do you know that sends droplets flying through the air when they don’t cover up.
Clerk: Droplets?
Me: Do you keep any clean bread in the back? I’m a Prime member.
Clerk: Um, no sir, this is all we have.
Me: So how does this work? Do customers wash their bread when they get it home? Do you sell bread cleaner?
Clerk: Um, no sir, we don’t have bread cleaner.
Me: Tell you what, can you clean a knife and then cut the dirty crust off the bread and give me the clean bread that’s on the inside?
Clerk: *whispers* Manager ...
Me: That’s a good idea, you should talk to the manager about this. They’ll probably give you a promotion. In the meantime I'll just get something off the shelf that was bagged in a factory. Thanks.
Clerk: *whimpers* Manager ...
