cancer

I think they made a movie about this

After my surgery last week I went to see the doctor on Wednesday, and to my surprise he handed me a piece of paper that says that the biopsy on the body stuff he removed shows that I have cancer. But then he quickly added that he thinks it’s a mistake. He did two surgeries that day, me and another person, and he said that he knew going in that the other person had cancer, but the lab test results show that I have cancer and the other person did not test positive. So he hopes the results got reversed somehow.

To get to the truthiness of the matter they took a DNA sample from me and they’re going to compare that to the cancerous material that’s still in the lab. (I didn’t think to ask how long they keep that stuff laying around.) He said it could take ten days before they know the result. I think they’ve made movies about this, but I don’t think I’ll be racking up any huge credit card bills or anything like that. ;)

3M apparently knew about PFOA/PFOS dangers since 1970s

Apparently 3M, which many people think of as a nice company, has known about the dangers of PFOA and PFOS — which is used to make Teflon and other products — for a long time. Per this story, “Internal studies and other documents show that 3M knew by the 1970s that PFOA and PFOS were toxic and accumulating in people's blood.”

Day 20 of the low iodine diet (before radioactive iodine treatment)

Dear Diary: Day 20 of not having a thyroid (because of thyroid cancer), not taking thyroid medicine, and the low-iodine diet.

I didn’t know if a person could lose weight without a thyroid, but I’ve dropped six pounds so far. In all I’ve dropped 20 pounds since I finished writing the Scala Cookbook (when I was working around the clock, not exercising, and eating crap).

Blood pressure is usually about 96/56, heart rate 48-54 BPM, and that’s without taking any heart meds. (I’d pass out for sure if I took those.) Low on energy and can’t take my usual long walks without getting the shakes.

Hopefully I’ll pass the blood test on Wednesday — my TSH level needs to be 30 or higher — so I can start the radiation treatment.

~ a note from June 16, 2014, after having my thyroid removed

Buying marijuana for my aunt

Kroger clerk: Can I help you sir? You look lost.

Me: Good morning. Yes, my aunt has terminal cancer and would like some marijuana. I was wondering where you keep it?

Clerk: Um ...

Me: I thought the raw product might be in Produce, but I didn’t see it there. I’d prefer organic if you have it.

Clerk: Um ...

Me: Then I didn’t know if the edibles would be in the Candy aisle, or maybe by the ibuprofen.

Clerk: Um, sir, we don’t sell marijuana here.

Me: OMG, why not? You could put it on the same aisle as the munchies, and revenue would go up immediately! Do you have a suggestion box? Or maybe I should talk to the store manager ...

(Note: The Kroger stores in Colorado are called King Soopers, but I figure that most people know the Kroger franchise, so I used that name here.)

That phone call you never want to get

After a routine phone blood test I got an unexpected phone call from a doctor last night. You know, that phone call you never want to get from a doctor. That one.

Prostate cancer test day

There’s not enough going on in my life, so I get to be tested for prostate cancer today. (And I’m not referring to a PSA test.)

Woo-hoo. #FakeEnthusiasm