funny

<p>all things funny and humorous</p>

I’d like to meet the person who first drank milk from a cow alvin May 18, 2017 - 9:23am

I’d like to meet the person who first drank milk from a cow. I’m curious about what led up to that decision.

This is obviously some strange use of the word “safe” that I wasn’t previously aware of alvin May 1, 2017 - 8:43am

Arthur: If I asked you where the hell we were, would I regret it?

Ford: We’re safe.

Arthur: Oh good.

Ford: We’re in a small galley cabin in one of the spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet.

Arthur: Ah, this is obviously some strange use of the word “safe” that I wasn’t previously aware of.

(From The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.)

Warning, coyote activity alvin April 30, 2017 - 10:50am

I found this, “Warning, coyote activity,” sign on Twitter this morning. We have a lot of coyotes in Colorado as well, so I’ll be sure to keep an eye out for dangerous coyote activity. ;)

Magneto flapping his wrist frantically alvin April 3, 2017 - 6:02pm

*Magneto flapping his wrist frantically, trying to shake loose a fork stuck to his hand*

The way calculus presents alvin March 28, 2017 - 9:55am

Dr. Foreman: The kid was just taking his calculus exam when all of a sudden he got nauseous and disoriented.

Dr. House: That’s the way calculus presents.

So you’re a glass half-empty kind of guy? alvin March 24, 2017 - 9:19am

“So you’re a glass half-empty kind of guy?”

“Depends what’s in the glass.”

Math for Dummies alvin March 17, 2017 - 10:07am

From bizarro.com. :)

The Republican Insurance Plan alvin March 14, 2017 - 11:35am

I see this morning that people are referring to the proposed 2017 healthcare plan as the Republican Insurance Plan — R.I.P., for short.

I’ll be drawing your blood today alvin January 26, 2017 - 10:32pm

Hi, my name’s Ray. I’ll be drawing your blood today as soon as I finish this Capri Sun.

*misses hole 4 times then punches straw through bag*

(Reminds me of a few people who have drawn my blood.)