funny

The way calculus presents

Dr. Foreman: The kid was just taking his calculus exam when all of a sudden he got nauseous and disoriented.

Dr. House: That’s the way calculus presents.

I’ll be drawing your blood today

Hi, my name’s Ray. I’ll be drawing your blood today as soon as I finish this Capri Sun.

*misses hole 4 times then punches straw through bag*

(Reminds me of a few people who have drawn my blood.)

December 8: The day of Buddha’s enlightenment alvin December 8, 2016 - 9:15am

December 8th is recognized as the day of Buddha’s enlightenment. Tonight that makes me think of this scene from Haven. :) (I’ll meditate more tomorrow.)

Shop local alvin October 31, 2016 - 9:41am

Even on Halloween, remember to shop local. :)

You know what a juice diet cleans out of you? alvin October 31, 2016 - 9:35am

“A month ago I went on a juice cleanse. You know what it cleans out of you best? The will to live.”

The health star

Building Inspector: What do you call this place?

Darth Vader: The death—

[inspector’s eyes look up from his clipboard]

Darth Vader: Uh ... the health star.