funny

<p>all things funny and humorous</p>

The Dalai Lama to retire after his next life (The Onion) alvin May 15, 2018 - 4:08pm

The Onion “reports” that the Dalai Lama says that his next life will be his last one before he retires.

Paraprosdokians

From a recent email:

Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous. Winston Churchill loved them.
 
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
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Every young person’s worth nightmare

Mark Zuckerberg is now living out every young person’s worth nightmare: Trying to explain how tech stuff works to the nation’s elderly.

~ someone on twitter yesterday

Asked for a book on Pavlov’s dog and Schrodinger’s cat

I went to the library and asked for a book on Pavlov’s dog and Schrodinger’s cat. The librarian said it rang a bell but she didn’t know if it was there or not.