People are curious creatures. I found out recently that in regards to Person A, if they say something and I don’t disagree with it, they’ll later tell Person B, “Al said that.” The first time I laughed it off like, “I never said that,” and when it happened the second time I had to tell Person B, “No, that’s not true, what happened is that Person A said that, and I was tired of the conversation and didn’t disagree with it just because I wanted to get out of the conversation.” That’s not cool.
“People inspire you, or drain you. Pick them wisely.”
~ Hans F. Hansen (image from positivelifetips.com)
“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”
~ Maya Angelou
I’m reminded of the time right before an interview for a contracting position that a tech recruiter called and told me, “Don’t appear to be too smart. Pretend that you can’t answer some of his questions if you have to. He won’t hire people he thinks are smarter than he is.” I answered every question he asked because if that’s the way he was, I didn’t want to work there.
As a manager or business owner — any kind of leader — always hire people that are smarter than you in one or more ways.
Some people come into your life and even if they don’t stay in it for long, they make an impact that changes you forever. Happy birthday to two people this month, one who made my life miserable, and another who made it wonderful.
“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”
Recent events remind me that people often have two reasons for doing something: a reason that they’ll tell you, and the real reason.
(I initially learned that when I read the 1947 version of this book by Frank Bettger.)
Here are two good quotes about coaching from this Jon Gruden article:
“He had a good demeanor about him, the way he got his point across. He always told me it was always about your demeanor and how you get your point across. He said, ‘You have to be a car salesman.’ If you want to sell plays, you can’t be short on energy. People want to be associated with people that have a lot of energy and love what they do and show enthusiasm, not someone who just walks in there and kind of goes through the motions.”
“I always tell people,‘You’ve gotta have a why.’ If you have a reason why, you’re most likely going to succeed. ... And those are the types of things as a coach, when you know those things, those are the buttons you can push. When you’re not hustling, when you’re not doing those things, it’s like, ‘Is that the type of example you’re trying to set for your little brothers?’ When you don’t know those things, you can’t use those things.”
Probably the most important lesson I learned from aimlessly wandering around Alaska and the Lower 48 for five years is that if you treat complete strangers as long-lost brothers and sisters that you’re meeting for the first time, the world magically becomes a better place.
“Learn to say, ‘I hope that works out for you’, rather than trying to ‘fix’ or change people.”
~ from Maryam Hasnaa, image by tinybuddha.com
(I see a lot of people who bring stress on themselves by trying to control friends, relatives, and partners. Unless you’re someone’s boss in a place of work, you should ask yourself, “Why do I feel the need to try to control other people?”)