For my “to listen to” list, Shane Parrish interviews Dan Ariely.
From that page: “Dan just about does it all. He has delivered 6 TED talks with a combined 20 million views, he’s a multiple New York Times best-selling author, a widely published researcher ... For the better part of three decades, Dan has been immersed in researching why humans do some of the silly, irrational things we do.”
Here’s a link to Dan Ariely’s page on Amazon.
These are the “Five Gatekeepers of Speech,” as found in this tweet by Joan Halifax, where she writes, “I feel to repost this now as a guard against lying becoming a norm in our society”:
- Is it true?
- Is it kind?
- Is it beneficial?
- Is it necessary?
- Is it the right time?
I learned about these gatekeepers a long time ago, both through my study of Zen and from my yoga teacher.
Here are a couple of good quotes from this article about the Golden State Warriors “truth teller” Ron Adams. First, about treating your work as your craft, and being a craftsman:
“I try to be an artisan,” he adds. “There is a purity to teaching as an assistant — a virtue in being a craftsman and having a craft. It’s the nuts-and-bolts stuff that appeals to me, and the relationships.
Then these quotes about telling the truth:
He learned something else. “On the farm, your rapport with your neighbor is critical,” Adams says. “There is a premium on honesty. You don’t fool people in that world.”
On the farm he learned to speak the truth — and to send the wine back. “My father, I remember him getting bales of hay,” he says, “and if it didn’t meet his standard, the response would be polite but firm: ‘This is good but not what I wanted.’”
Many people seem to struggle to say things that are either pleasant or unpleasant. I can’t speak for anyone else, but having gone through the process of not knowing if I was going to live through many days in 2016, I find it easier to say pretty much anything now. It’s like you really know your time is limited. If I had died one of those times instead of just getting sick and going unconscious I wouldn’t be here now, so it’s like I got some free tickets to have fun at the circus for a little while longer.
(I suppose that sometimes when you’re dealing with the opposite sex you have to be a little careful. Today I told a woman that I liked her hair (it was tinted red-ish), but then when I got “that look” I clarified it by adding that I didn’t say that because I wanted her to come over tonight to bake some cookies, I just liked what she had done with her hair.)
A quote from this article by Guy Kawasaki about Steve Jobs:
This experience taught me that you should tell the truth and worry less about the consequences for three reasons:
1) Telling the truth is a test of your character and intelligence. You need strength to tell the truth and intelligence to recognize what is true.
2) People yearn for the truth—that is, telling people that their product is good just to be positive doesn’t help them improve it.
3) There’s only one truth, so it’s easier to be consistent if you’re honest. If you are dishonest, you have to keep track of what you said.
There used to be a magical mirror, called the Mirror of Truth. If someone looked into it and said a lie, they would die immediately. In the land where it existed, everyone from kings to merchants was subject to its justice. One day Mulla Nasrudin came to this land and was brought before the Mirror of Truth to test his honesty. He declared, “I am telling a lie.” Nothing happened. “I think I broke your mirror,” said Mulla.
(I don’t remember where I read this, but I just found it in some old notes and thought I’d share it here.)
Amen, brother. Or sister. :) (Image from Twitter.)