Posts in the “personal” category

Here are two good quotes from this interview with Novak Djokovic (and a surprise appearance from Andre Agassi):

“I think the No. 1 requirement is constant desire and open-mindedness to master and improve and evolve yourself in every aspect. I know Roger has been talking about it, and it’s something I feel most top athletes of all sports agree on. Stagnation is regression.”

Djokovic says it helps to have a clear purpose, even if it is a different purpose. “I had to find my reason,” Agassi says. “It’s so important to have that reason.”

Years ago, a friend on posted this on Google+. Is it true? That I don’t know. I'm not a doctor, I’m an aerospace engineer and computer scientist. ;)

One thing I can tell you is that when my thyroid was failing with Hashimoto’s, I did some crazy things, even ending up in Haines, Alaska on a whim. And I can also tell you that taking L-tyrosine really helped later during the thyroid failure process.

“To be perfectly honest with you, I really feel that I have average physical ability, but when I get my psych and my self-hypnosis going, I can compete with anybody in anything.”

~ Al Hrabosky

Back in the day it was fun to watch “Mad” Al Hrabosky pitch for the St. Louis Cardinals. He would psyche himself up behind the mound and appear to get very angry, and indeed, he ended up in at least one brawl. Here’s a TWIB Note video of him pitching and talking, and here’s him talking years later about what he was doing behind the mound.

I don’t remember the original source of this image, but I like it: “I need to find more people who will sit and talk about the universe and souls and consciousness with me for hours.”

When I saw this again today I was reminded of the time I ended up in Vail, Colorado, talking to a younger version of myself.

“The greatest source of happiness is the ability to be grateful at all times.”

~ Zig Ziglar (and many others)

While many people will remember January 26, 2020, as the day Kobe Bryant died in a helicopter accident, I’ll also remember it as the first day I was able to sit down in five weeks following the Angiogram procedure. I still couldn’t sit long, maybe ninety minutes total before the pain kicked in, but that alone was nice.

Thanks to the angiogram, I haven’t been able to sit down for over a month. These days when I work, I either (a) read things while laying flat on my back in bed, or write while I’m standing up at this makeshift workspace in my apartment.

The top five regrets of the dying:

1) I wish I hadn’t worked so hard
2) I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
3) I wish I had let myself be happier
4) I wish I had the courage to express my true self
5) I wish I’d lived a life true to my dreams instead of what others expected of me

(Info comes from theguardian.com)

Here’s a photo from Virginia Beach at sunrise in late May, 2019. I used a dark black and white filter when taking the photo, but everything else is natural.

In case you were worried about Luke falling in The Empire Strikes Back. (From this collection of 66 behind the scenes photos.)

January 22, 2020: Good news, today is the first day I have been able to sit down without pain since December 23 of last year. For whatever reason it has taken the Angio-Seal in my leg this long to heal. But yesterday and today were the first days I have been almost 100% pain-free while standing, and so far I’ve been able to sit down for a little while, which is a very nice feeling. :)

“Do not fall in love with people like me. I will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. I will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.”

~ Caitlyn Siehl

The Washington Post has a touching story titled, What schizophrenia does to families.

Now this mountain I must climb,
Feels like the world upon my shoulders.

Through the clouds I see love shine,
It keeps me warm as life grows colder.

~ from the song, I Want to Know What Love Is, by Foreigner

If you’re into streaks and records, last night (January 17-18, 2020), was the first time I slept without pain since November 3, 2019 (thanks to the pericarditis and subsequent angiogram). I have no doubt that I snored a good snore. :)

Day 3: Yesterday I had way too much energy, but today’s mood is frustration, agitation, and impatience. Like this meeting tonight, I am not in the mood to be here. The part I hate is that I can’t be comfortable and happy with the people here. We’re all interested in the same thing (finally, people I can relate to!), and they’re all open and supportive. I hate that about myself.

Day 4: Arghh. I have way too much anger (rage!) right now. Everything here is so damn vague and the answers are #!$@ elusive. I just need to get out of this gathering and hit something. What am I really angry at? Where is this coming from?

Day 5: I would have left yesterday if it wasn’t for C stopping me at my car. I don’t know if she knew that she stopped me, but she did. Evening: Long talk with P. She spoke of giving fifteen years to her family, and while she doesn’t regret it, she expressed some remorse at giving up her career. But tonight she was dancing, and said I looked much happier.

Day 6: Last day. Long goodbyes with everyone, including C, I, F, J, N, and more. Asked N about something that happened last night at the rock, and she said I was very fortunate, it’s very rare. Leaving here is hard, it feels like graduating high school, knowing you’ll never see these people again who have been friends through all of this. I’m so grateful that C stopped me from leaving. Lots of tears all around.

(A few notes from a retreat I went on in 2006. I wrote a lot that week, and some of the notes get very personal, and it’s time to shred those, but I thought I’d share a few here.)

Just when Margaret thought Frank was going to say something else ...

This won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, but Sri Argala Stotram by Krishna Das is the prettiest song I’ve heard in a long time, and I didn’t even understand the first two-thirds of it.

Back on November 12, 2019, a Twitter user named Jomboy demonstrates how the Houston Astros were stealing signs against the lowly Chicago White Sox in a 2017 game. The interesting part here is that nobody was on second base, this video seems to show that they were stealing the signs from the catcher to the pitcher using the center field video feed.

“Thoughts are not facts.”

~ A quote from a local psychologist on the radio.

It seems that people who worry, worry about thoughts, not reality. I remember worrying a few years ago about doing a dance at a wedding, and in the end the reality was that I never had the chance to dance. What a waste of time that worry was.