February 11, 2019:
Sometimes dreams seem to exist to teach us things. Last night there was a very long dream sequence in which a deceased relative was a raging alcoholic. At one point I had to help him off the floor, and when I touched him I instantly saw many of the things he had seen, and felt what he was feeling. It was like 100% empathy, if that’s the right word for it. I immediately felt, “Wow, if I had been through these things I might be in the same shape myself,” so rather than feeling pity for him I felt empathy. I got him up into a chair and said, “Talk to me.” He tried to brush me off, but when I told him what I had seen and felt he began weeping and I hugged him for a while.
As the dream went on it was filled with people I like, people I don’t like, and others that I just don’t understand. So I touched them all and went through the same thing with each person, knowing everything about their lives to this point, always with the result of feeling empathy for them rather than other emotions like anger or pity or sorrow. There were concerns about cheating spouses/partners, issues with adoptions, parents, friends, body image, and much more.
One woman had lived with a verbally abusive husband for a long time, and it had affected her significantly. Another person had an abusive, alcoholic parent, and the other parent did nothing to stop it; how can you blame the child in that situation? One girl was obsessed with the thought, “Why was I born with a body like a boy?” It was an intense way of learning about people’s experiences and defense mechanisms.
It was a long morning filled with emotion and crying, but there’s no time to dwell on it as I have to go to the dentist and have a cavity drilled and filled. Unfortunately I’ll be awake for that.
books by alvin
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